#because to me it's mostly like yeah. I recognize this because it's the story I had in my head and I wrote it!

[i-bring-crack]

A–Aventio TGCF idea?? Wherein Civil God Veritas Ratio meets the infamous Ghost King Aventurine during his first mission cuz cuz like— The "live for me" paralels?!? The one who has all the luck partner as well?!? The villain who was actually not the Villain this whole time!?!? The loving humanity a little too much it causes their downfall !?!?!?

Rant AU in the tags proceed with caution

[lewyn-martell]

.

[merge-conflict]

18, 74, 26 for the fic writer asks! 🖤

Questions here

18. Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

Yes. Yes. Yes.

I usually retitle a fic or chapter at least once. I used to sit and agonize over the coolest title and just could NOT move on until I've done it, but now I just relax because I know I can update it. Generally what it's named in my Scrivener project is just some sort of placeholder or feeling. My usual vibe is "lyrics from a song which vibes" (yes. it is often the mountain goats... but not always! sometimes it's brown bird.) or "common phrase, but changed slightly" or "technical in-joke". Whatever I find most amusing.

Recently posted a fic called "done dying" which was originally titled "anthem for the already defeated" both of them from song titles (the first is actually "When I Was Done Dying"). I wrote all of the "the binds that tie" (playing with "the ties that bind") before settling on the title, but in my drafts it was always 'sudo chown -R vim:vim .' (now the chapter title). I like to have my cake and eat it too whenever possible. For stuff I can't come up with names for I've started titling them 'scrap: brief summary' or something I think is grandiose or funny so I can stop obsessing over it and start writing lol.

74. You’ve posted a fic anonymously. How would someone be able to guess that you’d written it?

Gosh. I've been thinking about this lately, and I do think I have a distinctive style but it's hard to describe because it's just.. the way I write? I know I have a problem repeating adjectives like 'just' 'some' 'only' a lot, so that's one give away. My habit of just smash-cutting into the middle of a scene without much setup is probably another. My habit of using repetitive sentence construction to hammer in a point. My habit of writing too much damn banter.

26. Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

Tbh the damn things overlap was created to be each damn thing overlapping the next, a huge mess, very little time to breathe (condensing the canon timeline down to about two weeks of Valentine going through main storyline stuff. ~a week of which is actually in the the fic!) I wanted to write a story where you feel relieved when characters get to sit down or take a nap, and I think I've succeeded thus far.

Honorable mention to when her edges soften, where Johnny and Valentine hit the town and each other. Straight from "I'm not gonna fuck you" to competitively tracking the number of orgasms they've both had in the past 3 hours while fucking in alleyways and cars. That might qualify as a sort of wild ride. :3

[cultivating-wildflowers]

Writers: unless the POV character can actually see an aspect of their appearance (via a mirror or because it's on a part of their body or clothing that they can see by looking down or around), they should not be describing that feature. For example, your character shouldn't be saying that their own skin has gone ashen, or that their eyes are bright, etc. What you can do to convey those things are to describe how they feel (light-headed, giddy) or have another character remark on their appearance. Or, of course, have them look in a mirror.

[zweigsangel]

ex fratboy! chris. smut-angst. 1.8k words.

it’s one of those late nights, and you’re standing there in the middle of a way-too-crowded, kinda messy party that, honestly, you only came to ‘cause your friends dragged you here. the air's thick with too many people, bad beer, and random songs blaring loud enough to drown out any thoughts you might’ve had. and that’s when you see him: chris. the ex you swore you were over. but like, really, are you?

it’s weird though, ‘cause he’s just chilling across the room, laughing too loud, his arm around some guy you don’t recognize, talking animatedly about god knows what. he’s got that same stupid, loose stance, shoulders relaxed, wearing that hoodie he always wore, the one you’d stolen a million times. you think— hope, he hasn’t noticed you, so you kinda try to blend in, sticking close to the wall, pretending to check your phone.

you weren’t always like this, all distant and tense. you’d meet up after his frat meetings, and he’d tell you all these wild stories about his brothers, like the time they tried building a slip n’ slide down the staircase and ended up getting written up by their advisor. you’d just sit there laughing so hard you’d cry, and he’d look at you like nothing in the world could ever compare. and for a while, it felt like he was it. but it ended, kinda messy, mostly because chris was…well, chris. he’d blow off plans, flirt with people at parties, and honestly, it just felt like he didn’t know what he wanted. or maybe he did, and it just wasn’t you. he’d show up late and drunk, ramble on about his deep thoughts on the universe, and then disappear for days, leaving you feeling like some kind of afterthought. eventually, you got tired of being the whenever person, so you cut it off. even if it hurt.

it’s been a few months now, and you’re doing your thing—focusing on classes, seeing friends, trying to move on.

but nah. of course he sees you.

“yo, wait up,” he calls, weaving his way through people, looking right at you. you try to act casual, like this isn’t a big deal, like you don’t feel your stomach flip. he stops in front of you, that grin still hanging on his face. “hey,” he says, shoving his hands in his pockets. “long time no see, huh?”

“yeah, well, been busy,” you reply, shrugging. it sounds casual enough, but he’s still looking at you like he’s trying to read something on your face.

“you look good,” he says after a pause, and it’s so out of character for him to just say something like that, straight-up, that it throws you off for a second “uh...thanks?” you laugh, awkwardly. you know he’s probably just trying to be friendly, but you can’t help wondering if there’s more to it. “so...you still doing the same old chris thing?”

he laughs, rubbing the back of his neck, looking away for a second. “i guess so,” he mutters, more to himself than to you. and then he kinda sighs, like he’s tired of the frat boy act, or maybe just tired of himself. “been, uh…been thinkin’ about you,” he admits, his voice low. “more than i probably should.”

you try to brush it off, folding your arms to keep your cool. “oh, yeah? that’s, uh, new.”

“i know, i know, i messed up,” he says, sighing. “just…never got you outta my head, y’know?” you can feel yourself softening despite everything. “yeah, well, maybe you should’ve tried harder.”

he looks at you, his eyes searching yours, and there’s this vulnerability there, like he’s finally ready to admit something he’s been holding back. “you think i didn’t? trust me, i tried. i just…i dunno. couldn’t do it.”

you don’t want to care, don’t want to feel that old pull, but it’s there, creeping up on you. he steps closer, barely an inch between you now, his gaze never leaving yours. “you want me to back off?” he murmurs, his voice barely audible over the music. “just tell me, and i will.”

you could tell him to go. could shut this down, walk away, stay done with him. but instead, you shake your head, just a tiny movement, and he lets out a soft breath, like he’s been holding it in. before you can think, his hand’s on your waist, his fingers brushing lightly over your hip, pulling you closer.

the kiss starts slow, tentative, his lips brushing over yours like he’s testing if this is real. then his hand moves up, slipping around your back, and it’s like something inside you snaps. you grab the front of his hoodie, pulling him closer, and he lets out a low sound, his grip on you tightening as he presses his body against yours, his mouth moving over yours with more intensity.

“missed you,” he whispers against your lips, his voice rough, desperate. you barely register the words, just feel the heat rising between you two, feel his hands sliding lower, pulling you against him, his fingers firm on your waist, his mouth moving along your jaw, down to your neck, sending shivers through you. you tug him toward the hallway, away from the crowded room, and he follows, his hand gripping yours, letting you lead him through the maze of people until you push open the bathroom door, dragging him inside.

the space is cramped and a little dingy, but you don’t care. the second the door clicks shut, his hands are on you, pushing you gently but firmly against the door. his mouth crashes into yours, hot and urgent, and your hands find their way under his hoodie, slipping over his chest, feeling the warmth of his skin. you tug the hoodie off him, and he lifts his arms to help you, tossing it aside without a second thought, his hands already back on you, roaming down your sides, exploring every inch.

he kisses you harder, more intense, his lips pressing down your neck, his hands slipping under your top, that quickly joins the hoodie on the floor.

“god, i’ve wanted this for so long,” he murmurs, his voice low, almost a growl. “yeah? thought you forgot about me,” you tease, but there’s no real bite to your words. it’s playful, but you both know the truth behind it.

“never forgot. couldn’t stop thinkin’ ‘bout you,” he admits, his hands sliding up to your bra, deft fingers working to unclasp it. you feel a thrill of excitement mixed with nerves as it falls away, and his hands are on your bare skin, exploring, his touch igniting every nerve in your body.

“you’re, uh…sure about this?” he murmurs, his voice low, his hand coming up to rest on your cheek, his thumb brushing over your skin. you don’t even hesitate. “yeah,” you whisper, barely able to keep your voice steady.

he lets out a soft, almost relieved sound, and his mouth finds yours again, hungrier this time, like he’s been holding back and can’t anymore. his hands slide down, finding the waistband of your skirt, tugging it down, his touch steady and deliberate, like he knows exactly what he’s doing. you step out of it, your pulse racing as his hands explore you, pulling you closer, pressing you against him.

you tug at his belt, fingers fumbling, but he’s already helping, working the buckle loose, kicking off his jeans. he’s back against you in a second, his hands on your hips, his lips trailing down your collarbone, leaving a trail of warmth and shivers in their wake.

he lifts you, setting you on the counter, your legs wrapping around his waist. “you okay?” he asks, checking in, “yeah, jus’ do it,” you whisper, barely able to hold back the urge to pull him closer, “please.”

he’s kissing you again, his mouth moving against yours as you feel him press against you, hot and hard, and you let out a soft gasp. “need you,” he murmurs, almost pleading, and that raw honesty sends a thrill through you. you nod, breathless, and he positions himself, sliding inside you slowly, giving you a moment to adjust. it feels incredible, every inch of him fitting perfectly, like he was made for you.

“god, you’re so tight,” he groans, burying his face in your neck, and the sound of his voice makes you moan softly. as he starts moving, the rhythm is slow at first, deliberate, and you feel every thrust, every movement building inside you. he’s murmuring your name, breathless, and the heat between you is consuming. you wrap your legs tighter around him, pulling him in deeper, urging him to go faster.

“yeah? you like that?” he asks, his breath hot against your skin as he quickens the pace. it feels electric, every thrust sending shockwaves through you, and you nod, lost in the sensation.

“so good, chris,” you moan, the words tumbling out as you feel that familiar coil tightening deep inside you. he leans back, looking at you with those dark, intense eyes, and it drives you wild. “gonna make you feel good, okay?” he says, and there’s something in the way he says it that makes your heart race.

with each thrust, the world outside fades away. it’s just the two of you, the heat of the moment enveloping you, and you feel that sweet pressure building, your body responding to every touch, every whisper, until you’re trembling around him, ready to fall apart.

“come on, babe,” he encourages, his voice low and rough, and you can hear the strain in it as he moves faster, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. “can’t hold on much longer,” you breathe, feeling that familiar rush as he hits just the right spot, sending you spiraling.

“let go for me,” he says, his voice thick with desire, and the way he looks at you, his eyes dark and hungry, pushes you over the edge. with a loud gasp, you’re coming undone, waves of pleasure crashing over you, and he follows right after, burying himself deep as he lets go. the sound of his voice, mixed with yours, fills the tiny bathroom, and in that moment, it’s just the two of you, lost in each other, together again in a way you thought you’d never be.

as you both come down from the high, he pulls you close, resting his forehead against yours, breathing heavily, trying to catch his breath. he doesn’t say anything, just lets the silence settle between you, a quiet, unspoken apology wrapped up in the way he looks at you, his eyes softer than you remember, like maybe he’s finally realized what he’s been missing all along.

and for now, it’s enough to let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, this time will be different.

[tornioduva]

Dungeon meshi and body proportions

Ok, i'm feeling the rush i got from binging the manga this last week is starting to fade away, i'll be back to being a normal person soon i think. at least, that is before i find a new something for me to dive into uhuh.

Before that happens, i want to praise Ryoko Kui for one last think. The design of the characters!

For years i've expressed (maybe not so much online) my hate towards the "anime style", this homogenization of traits and beauty standards to an artificial degree, and the mass spread and consumption of it. yes, trends exist for a reason, this is not the first nor the last art current to be popular and i'm not the first detractor of one in history. I do think there is something uniquely harmful in this one though, and that is why i'm able to find the energy to be such a pretentious dipshit about it. That is a discussion for another day though.

All this to say that going through Dungeon Meshi and seiing these characters, plus (and in a way because of it) all the additional sketches of the daydream hour bonus sections, was such a breath of fresh air! (at least for what concerns japanese exported stories)

All i could say and praise in regard to character designs in general is perfectly expressed in this video, which i recommend you to watch if you want to hear my opinions (and the video author's too, uhuh):

I want to leave you though with at least one specific praise for me: Falin.

i've seen countless time people (online) just not understanding how people's body work, how much differences there can be and how proportions do distribute and affect the body. in anime I see a lot of short and tall people (mostly women girls) that share the same proportions despite their actual height, and that often leads to think "yeah, she is short" and than she's tall when around someone, or (most often) the contrary. same lenght of limbs, same head to body proportions, and little details like this.

Falin you can tell at a glance she is a tall woman before she's around anyone, even when she is standing near her brother who is taller than her.

Kui did her homework in studying bodies and variations, and, whether consciously or not, she differentiated her in body in subtle but fundamental ways: her head being slightly smaller than her body, the neck being fairly long, and her having somewhat broader shoulders.

I accept that there might be an element of suggestion at play here, considering also how she is dressed most of the time, but I really do think there is a direct effort at differentiation here.

This is the first time in a long time (in a series like this at least) where i've seen a woman carrying herself around others and the space around here kind of like a person like me, tall, would; at first i didn't think much of it, but then i saw her near other characters and....i don't know, i felt a warm, joyful feeling, seeing that i was right in recognizing that trait and being right.

I was especially happy in seeing her next to marcille. not so much for the height difference, but for how different they were in proportions and mannerism. A lesser manga i fear would have used marcille's body type and way of moving and interacting as the default for most other girls, but here she was uniquely herself!

Now, i could've used more extreme exemples to show how this author rocks in body types representations (while aknowledging there could've been even more diversification still), given there are far larger, taller and stranger women, but to me, nailing the little, most subtle details in such a chirurgical manner shows a greater level of mastery and comprehension. As such, Falin left me with a deeper fascination than most other characters.

Sorry for this wall of text, but i needed to let my happy thoughts go, so that i could be free again uhuh.

Feel free to tell me that i'm wrong, or that i should just accept anime media as is. i'm just really happy Dungeon meshi exists as is and i want Ryoko Kui to keep refining her craft, and drawing beautiful women and dwarves.

Plus, this was very much a stream of consciousness, i didn't go into technical details about what i think conveyed what i described, but if someone is interested, or does not get what i'm saying (while expressing it in a curious and gentle way, i won't respond to spiteful assholes), i'll be happy to make a follow up post in which i try to dissect this! For example, i didn't reread the whole manga to find examples of her, i just went to the wiki uhuh. in a follow up post maybe i'll try to go through chapters and pick more specific examples of her.

Anyway, have a good day!

[angels-fantasy]

Top Secret Fiction Ch. 6

The Confrontation

Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

Description: After meeting the one and only pro hero Dynamight on a dating app, you two begin to see each other. Because of the dangers that come with his hero work, you both promise to be completely honest with each other from the beginning; though you can't help but keep one big secret from him.

You write fan fiction, mostly about him.

Chapter Details: deku makes an appearance here heheh. bakugou lowkey might like fanfics? but only if they're about him. scary confrontation 😟 reader is a bit sad and confused :(

Word Count: 1.4k

previous chapter

As soon as Bakugou got home, he opened his computer and looked up 'Bakugou x Reader'. What came up was a ton of links to different websites, one of the top ones being HeroFiction.Com.

Clicking on it, he scrolled through the sight and found many other original stories about different pro heroes.

While doing this, he learned that this was called fan fiction, which he'd heard about before, but he never paid attention to it because he didn't care.

Keeping the website open, he leaned back and wondered, were you writing fan fiction about him? You must've been, based on your notes. Did you write for other pro heroes, or just him?

A small part of him hoped you only wrote for him.

He sighed and rubbed his hands down his face, trying to think about what the hell he was going to do about this. Clearly, this was something you didn't want to tell him, meaning you kept it a secret.

And he hates secrets, but for some reason, this didn't feel too bad. He was almost... flattered, in a way. He was also curious and he just wanted to know more. But how would he even bring this up to you?

Deciding he'd need help with understanding this website, he called someone he trusted.

"Hey Deku. You know what fan fiction is, right?"

Blushing, Izuku replied with "Why are you asking me that Kacchan?!"

"Because I know you used to write that shit back in high school!" He explained, "Just tell me what you know about this site called 'HeroFiction.com.'"

A lightbulb went off in Izuku's head, "Oh yeah I recognize that name! It's basically a website for pro hero fanfiction. I've seen a few good ones actually-"

"Yeah okay, thanks." Katsuki said, cutting off his friend.

It was time for him to do more of his own research, specifically on this website.

...

When you woke up the next morning, you found yourself in your bed wondering how you got there.

Did I fall asleep? You wondered.

You cringed at the thought of Bakugou seeing you asleep and hoped you didn't do anything embarrassing.

Rubbing your eyes, you grabbed your phone from the nightstand and saw a text from Bakugou letting you know he had left after putting you in your bed.

You smiled at his thoughtfulness and texted him back a thank you, and an apology for falling asleep while he was over.

After tossing your phone down onto the bed next to you, you stretched and blinked away any leftover sleep.

As you were stretching your legs you felt your foot hit something softly. Wondering what it was, you sat up and looked at the foot of your bed, eyes widening when you realized it was your notebook.

But this wasn't just any notebook- this one had all of your notes for fics you were planning on writing.

You thought about how Bakugou brought you into your bedroom, and your heart sank to your stomach when you realized he probably saw your notebook.

"Noooo!" You cried and placed your hands over your eyes. "Kill me now..."

You prayed to any higher power out there that he didn't read anything.

...

Your prayers clearly didn't reach anyone because a few hours after waking up, you got a text from Bakugou that said, "Can we talk? ASAP."

Biting your nail nervously, you texted back "Sure" and asked when and where he'd want to meet up.

Quickly texting back, he told you he'd meet you at a cafe near your neighborhood in a few hours.

A little while later as you got ready to meet up with him you felt like you were going to cough up your stomach and die from your nerves.

You didn't want to accept it, but deep down you knew he figured out your secret. It was already terrifying trying to keep what you did in your free time a secret, but now that the person you wrote about knew, was even more terrifying!

It seemed as though your frantic thoughts made time go by even faster than usual, and it was now time for you to leave so you could make it to the cafe on time.

Taking a deep breath and patting your face, you stepped out of your apartment and began to head to the cafe.

...

As Bakugou sat at the cafe in the outdoor dining area, he tapped his foot anxiously as he awaited your arrival.

After his phone call with Deku and doing his own research (which just consisted of reading other fan fictions he came across), he came to the conclusion that he would accept this hobby of yours, if you were honest about it when he confronted you.

Since he had browsed the website a bit, he came across some stories that were actually decent (but also others that were very, very questionable and he really hoped you didn't write anything like that. ESPECIALLY not a story with him and that damn Deku).

He'd never admit it, but it boosted his ego a bit to know that you wrote about him, and he definitely wanted to read some of your stuff. He wanted to know if it was as good as some of the other ones he has read.

Suddenly, he saw your figure walking towards him and he was snapped out of his thoughts. He sat up straighter and placed his elbows against the table, leaning forward.

You sat down across from him silently with a shy look on your face. "So..." You said softly, "You wanted to talk?"

He cleared his throat, "Yeah. I'll just get to the point..." He said, before hesitating to say, "That night I was at your place, I saw your notebook-"

You grimaced, knowing exactly what he was talking about, and placed your hands over your face in embarrassment. "I'm sorry." You said.

Letting out a deep breath, you uncovered your face and continued to speak while looking down at your lap. "I knew this would come up eventually, I just didn't think it'd be so soon..."

Bakugou scoffed, "So when were you gonna tell me? Never?"

You frowned at his tone, "No! It's just not an easy topic to talk about Bakugou. It's embarrassing and I wasn't just going to say 'Hey Bakugou, did you know I've been writing fan fiction about you for three years?'"

He blinked. He could understand where you were coming from. In fact, he'd probably be more weirded out if you had told him that easily. But, even though you were honest now, it still doesn't shake his uneasiness about you keeping a secret from him.

Sure, it wasn't a huge, life threatening secret, but it was still something you kept from him. He liked honesty, especially in a relationship and it's something he valued heavily. A part of him felt like he should've known about this sooner, since it was about him for gods sake!

He sighed. "Before you go assuming things, I'm not mad at ya, okay?" He said, "I just... I think I need time to think about this alright? A few days at most."

You furrowed your eyebrows subconsciously, making your eyes look big and puppy like. Well damn, how was he supposed to stay away from you when you gave him that look?

"Okay." You spoke sadly, "I understand. I shouldn't have kept that from you, so again, I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "'S fine."

You rubbed your sweaty palms on your legs and stood up. "I'll give you time now, alright? Just, call or text me whenever you're ready." You said and gave him a small wave before walking back in the direction you came from.

As you made your way back, you thought about your talk with Bakugou.

If you wanted to keep seeing him, maybe you would have to stop writing. You were starting to really like Bakugou, and you didn't want a silly hobby to get in the way of a potentially serious relationship with him.

You felt your eyes tear up. It was hard to think about giving up writing. You had made friends through your writing, your own little community online. It was great! But realistically, could you keep this up forever?

That same night, you posted on your page.

Hi everyone. I've decided to take a break from writing for a while. I'm not sure how long it will be, but I will still leave everything here for you to read.

Thank you, xo.

authors note

HIII omg im so sorry i haven't updated this fic in a while 🥹 this chapter was actually really fun to write and omg writing readers thoughts at the end lowkey made me sad!! how do you feel about it? pls lmk!!

love ya!

tag list: @doumadono @54fangirl @andysdrafts @dagger-dragger @lovra974 @l4rsun1vrrse @emmab3mma @littlkittenfan @tatiquichi @cloudxluv @seonne @shonen-brainrot @the2ndl @gold24fish @cxp1d @rv19 @gina329

(those in pink couldn't be tagged)

[krokonoko]

okay so a couple more nuanced thoughts about the whole JayVik thing

if you're not satisfied with the ending we got for them, I get it.

I know ppl have been handing this around celebrating that all the queers get something in Arcane but. I mean, MAN if this lineup isn't a perfect illustration of where there's still work to be done when it comes to equal treatment of queer relationships in media.

but at the same time, personally, I'm still mostly satisfied with what we got. and not because of "let men be platonic friends". cause jfc how often do we have to say it: they are never anything BUT platonic friends. "the moment is stronger because it's platonic" look, as a whole ass aspec person: shut. the moment would not have been cheapened by a queer kiss. but I digress.

the reason I'm alright with this might be because I expected worse. like, way worse. that, and also this moment did not feel cynical to me, or queerbait-y, or like it was trying to satisfy all sides. it felt very earnest to me.

and I haven't kept up with creator interviews or anything, but from what I've gathered, there seems to have been a certain. lack of unity? when it comes to how the different parties viewed the relationship between JayVik, starting with LoL's notorious reluctance to confirm male characters' queerness, and ending with statements from writers and staff being pretty contradictory when it comes to these two.

so personally, this looks to me like a situation that might be a bit similar to Korrasami. it's giving "we all know what this is, but this is as far as we can/are willing to go."

do I still think that's kind of unfair? yeah.

do I have a couple other gripes with Arcane, and esp its ending? you know it! (mostly as in. Jinx is not really dead. right? you can't be fr about that.)

but when I add everything up, I'm walking out of this with a very positive tally. and that includes JayVik. and I think recognizing that there's still work to be done is important, but I also think if you're handed one of the most epic queer love stories in history, even if it doesn't dare speak its name, it's alright to be happy about it!

[toska-writes]

Hello Toska!

I really enjoy reading your stories, they are really good! I see so many fanfics that swear, or have nasty stuff, but yours are good. I was wondering if you do requests? If so, could you do one with the Bad Batch (mostly Hunter and Crosshair) where the reader is a female Jedi? And the reader goes on a mission and risks their life to protect one of the Bad Batch but they get injured? Take as much time as you need, thank you for your time! :)

Yeah this may be from a few months ago…. But here we are

“Concussion Protocol”

Summary: concussions are risky business, and a certain “unconcerned” sniper makes sure everything this ok

Pairing: Crosshair x Reader (Platonic)

Warning: small mention of blood, throwing up I guess, nothing crazy

Word count: 1313 (I meant for this one to be a short blurb but whatever

Notes: I changed up the request a bit but it was just a small thing I wanted to write

The ringing was so loud. Though maybe it was so loud because everything else is so quiet. Or maybe you couldn’t hear anything else at all.

The only thing you did know is that if you kept thinking about this it would make your head hurt more than it already was.

And that was saying something. Your head felt like it weighed an extra 50 pounds as you were hunched over trying desperately to catch any breath and keep your head from hitting the floor.

Ringing, that’s all it was. For a moment you could hear your own thought and could have sworn something touched your shoulder.

You couldn’t tell, it didn’t matter at this point because in all honesty you couldn’t even tell where you are.

No no the something definitely touched your shoulder because it was a lot firmer this time. Your whole body shook with whatever was on your shoulder and if it wasn’t for something else grasping your other arm you definitely would have fallen over.

You looked over slightly, more even breaths rolled through you now, and finally something came into focus. A hand…. Oh that’s what was holding you up right now.

The shaky image of helmet comes into your view with a hand now place under your chin slightly lifting it up.

The way the helmet was moving you assumed the person hold be talking to you, it was either that or the world was spinning around you.

They looked familiar, whoever they were, but if you tried to think anymore you were pretty sure your head would pop right off. What did even happen? It was blurry looking back now.

Crosshair watched them for a moment, their eyes lost in thought finally trained back onto him but only for a moment before they drooped again.

He felt the growing weight of your face in his palm before you slumped over even more

“Okayyyy” He muttered more to himself since the calls of your name moments ago fell on deaf ears. The first thing Crosshair had to do was get you off of the battle field.

He was just lucky he saw you in time, the amount of now broken battle droids scattered around your unaware mind scared him. Scared him more than he would like to admit.

“I found them, I just need someone to cover me.” Crosshair spoke cooly into the comm, the panic rising in him however contradicted him.

A confirm from someone on the other side didn’t really matter to Crosshair at this moment, it mattered getting you to open your eyes again.

Finally the ringing died down, enough to recognize there was a voice coming from somewhere extremely close to you. It took a moment more to realize it was your name someone spoke.

The fight to open your eyes was hard. The dying light still hurt your eyes as they tried to adjust again.

“Hmmm?” Was all you could get out before you felt a thumb trace over part of your forehead.

It worried Crosshair of where this blood was coming from, he tried to keep in away from your mouth and eyes with his thumb for a moment.

The sound of blaster fire sounded closer to his head than he would have liked.

“Come on Crosshair go!” He heard hunter practically yell in his ear. Right he could worry about wiping your face later.

You felt yourself move off the ground slightly. Looking around you were about to protest to the person that you still couldn’t identify in your state, but the swirling world did not pair well with your head. This resulted in you quickly shoving your head towards the armored chest that held you.

A groan must have escaped your lips but a husked voice reassured you quickly. Wait no you definitely knew that voice, but for the love of maker a face nor name could make it to your brain.

A feeling did however, and it was warm in your chest- you had nothing to worry about if he was here.

“Where are we going?” You finally managed to slur some words together without moving your head too much.

“Towards the Marauder.” He spoke clearly to you, no more ringing seemed to disrupt your hearing. “Can you tell me what that is?”

The question struck you as odd for a moment. Of course you knew what the Marauder was….right? That didn’t stop you from thinking for a moment before you responded with “… a ship?”

“I’m actually impressed” was all that came from whoever held you as he started to slow down more. You couldn’t tell with your eyes closed when your surroundings changed but a quick tap to your check and you opened your eyes to the inside of a ship.

“Is this…” you started, a limp hand gestured around before returning with a thump to your lap. “ the Marauder.

The figure now crouched in front of you with on hand keeping you sitting straight up nodded once before reaching with his other hand a removing his helmet.

“Can you remember anything else?” He spoke softly and slowly to you, but you didn’t answer.

The man had a tattoo over his eye, one that caught your attention immediately.

You knew who that was. A smile broke across your lips and a small laugh forced its way through your mouth. A shaky hand of yours reached out to the side of his face with the tattoo. He let it happen and watched your face hoping for any recognition.

“Crosshair.” Finally something you remembered

The man, now you were sure was Crosshair, nodded ever so slightly again but the smirk was prominent in his features.

“I’m going to clean your head ok?” He rasped.

The smile couldn’t be swiped from your face either as you continued to smile at him. “Crosshair.” You spoke again. Just like the first time it wasn’t a question, you were sure.

He hummed as a response before pushing you back slightly and dampening a rag as he still was crouched on the floor.

“I’m tired.” It was the first and only thing you were thinking about or could think about. The pounding in your head and the swirling of the world was becoming too much.

“You just have to wait a few seconds for me ok?” The cool ragged touch your face and surprisingly didn’t burn. “I just have to make sure nothing too serious is going on up there.” He poked the middle of your forehead with his finger.

Crosshair deemed his work satisfactory enough when he could finally locate one of the many cut along your forehead. Grimacing at it he decided that it would definitely need stitches.

But you didn’t have to know that right now. “All done.” His nimble hands returned to your shoulders pulling you up. Your eyes once again opened, though you couldn’t fall asleep since Crosshair did anything in his power for you to keep talking to him.

“Is it nap time?” He almost couldn’t make out your words for a moment before he took your face in and sigh.

“Don’t tell Tech, but yeah I think you deserve a nap time.” Crosshair still planned to scan for more injury’s but could letting you sleep change a lot?

Before he knew it your body leaned forward and quickly crashed into his own, your head found its stop between his shoulder plate and his neck perfectly.

The words were soft now muffled into his skin but he could nearly make out “Thanks Crosshair.” The voice faded out towards the end but that what brought the smile back to his face.

Thought he was sure they would never hear it again small “ Of course ad’ika” was muttered into the air before he scooped the padawan up into his arms once again to move them someplace more comfortable.

————————————————————

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[httyd-art-requests]

Heya! I wasn't sure if this was a legal request since it wasnt listed in your bio, but it is an official httyd video game

I'd love to see the goofy guy Patch from dawn of new riders! Chimeragons really made one appearance, became way too op, and then disappeared into obscurity. But look at the guy...he so ugly and goofy I love him

Your art is gorgeous btw!

( @yuendelahoya )

So funny story. I watched a playthrough of this game when it first came out in 2019, and it's been on my wish list ever since (mostly because of the flight mechanics lol) And now that I found these asks in my inbox again, I checked the Nintendo Store just in case, and it had a 55% discount??? So I got the game and spent the last 2 days playing it and now I'm a changed man (as of posting this, the discount lasts for 2 more days!)

Dragon #125 - MLM Patch (and Scribbler)

I hope they're doing well, wherever they are...

More thoughts and spoilers for the game under the cut!

I made Patch MLM colored instead of some other random Chimeragon, because the game has shown us that he can change colors with every rebirth, which I think is pretty neat :) It also explains why neither Scribbler nor Eir recognize Patch, even after he grows to be a Broadwing and then a Titanwing- if he changes his colors every time he hatches again, then yeah, no wonder they believed there's more than one Chimeragon

I knew what the big twist was going to be at the end because of the playthrough, but MAN does this game not hold its punches. The writers really asked "How can we elevate the Best Friends Forever thing to a whole new level?" and then made Scribbler witness the death and rebirth of his best friend, and now I have to draw these guys with literal tears in my eyes 👍

The sentiment that their friendship literally transcends life and death is so meaningful to me. Patch will continue to die and resurrect, and Scribbler will be there every time to welcome him and forge their bond all over again. The mystery of Scribbler's past, his involvement with Grimmel, and the open ending leave so much room for speculation and theorizing and it's just so incredibly up my alley, it's like it was made in a lab for me lol

This game ended up being a lot darker than I was expecting, but it was honestly so refreshing. The mechanics are simple enough for younger kids to learn, and the artstyle is very evidently targeted at kids as well, but some of the dialogue and the entire theme of death and inevitable loss feels surprisingly mature in contrast. They make you go to Vanaheim and hold a burial for Patch before he resurrects, literally what other kids' game does that?? /pos

Anyways play this game, it's a short and sweet little self-contained adventure, which accomplishes the one task it set out to accomplish: making me cry, specifically

[anonymouscheeses]

Im sorry i have to say it..: Get Your Hands Dirty sounds like a love song.

HEAR. ME. OUTT!! (No i dont mean a love song between Chloe n Ella omg 😭)

What I'm implying here is that it sounds like one of those niche high school love stories when one of the lovers(most likely a goodie two-shoes) goes to their mentor/parent/even the person their loving/etc to ask for advice on relationships. Or more specifically, if this person is worth it or even a good person. From the top of my head: I Won't Say (I'm In Love) and the goodie and the wildchild dynamic is pretty similar to Gabriella and Troy from hs musical, which iws(iil) kinda inspired this post tbh but also ive been thinking about this ever since i first watched the movie. (You plop in ur own songs, i js KNOW this trope exists)

Now that we've established the well used niche trope existing in this niche song made by the niche king that is Disney.... why do i think that Get Your Hands Dirty is a love song, i hear?

Lets analyze THE LYRIICS 😈😈

"Right and wrong, cruel and kind, who's to say?" "There's a code that I believe in."

"Robin Hood" "yeah?" "Awesome guy" "yeah!"

"Every choice, you're gonna find there's shades of grey." "There are rules for a reason!"

"So you could then cross that line, theoretically."

"You'd agree?" "But he stole for the poor."

"The decision's always up to you. When there's only one thing left to do"

"I don't know you anymore.."

Okay, so i shortened and made it tiny for obvious reasons, that bein its too long 😭 so! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS A FEEELIN?? a feelin that this is SCREAMING denial?! Its giving...

Chloe: Ellaaaa.... this girl im talkn to is SOOO HHHOOOOTT and PRETTY and cool and stuff but ugh.... SHE EEEVILLL!!

Ella: oh my gosh.. STFU. Shes prolly not even that evil ill prove it smh..

*get ur hands dirty starts playing. No exaggeration. No cap.*

"Okay, but there's some universal truths you must recognize." "Like?"

"Valiant knights, pure and good, guaranteed" "That depends on what they're fighting for"

"Creepy witches selling potions for evil deeds" "She could have kids she's providing for"

"If your good-good things will come to you"

MORE denial, Chloe wants to be friends with Red SO bad she looks stupid, but she brings herself back by trying to prove to herself that she's evil and they SHOULDN'T be that close. Which also is a big sign of comphet and heteronormativity, i would know 🧍 (which is a post for another day i might make. Prolly 2 prove that Chloe is a lesbian in deep comphet)

"But just how far do you go? How much do you compromise? Oh, tell me, how do you know. Where do you draw the line?"

"There's nothing I wouldn't do. If my heart tells me it's right. If it's for someone I love. If it's to save a life."

"To save your life."

Further deepening the trope i mentioned. The first line could be interpreted as a double meaning since the song is kind of mostly about Chloe coming to terms with the fact Red isn't really evil or as bad as she thought, plus the argument of where the line between evil and good is. It could refer to Red or Ella, maybe both, but Ella changes the meaning with her own experiences so it drifts off the focus from Red because we cant have ANYTHING 🤧 but i still believe Chloe intended it to be for Red since the entire song is really just for the progress of their relationship n stuff.

Now this could definitely all be in my head, yes, Disney would most likely NEVER canonize or even imply heavily a queer relationship or anything lgbtq on a pre established franchise (cowards.). But there is always a chance.... deep inside the dark heart of the mouse..

Plus, with the subtle hints here and there of Red and Chloe's relationship growing, romantically or not, they are still super close and love eachother alot. Chloe is js (kinda) canonically a girl kisser who cant help but find a girl kissable (same)

And don't get me started on this movie and its obsession with love and proving how it is not "ain't it". Hello...? They set the tone of love, but i see NO person close enough to Red established for this message (other than Chloe) and if they introduce some random guy in the next movies, NO ONE would care nor would they want it unless somehow its 100x better than redcharming, but thats impossible cz wlw 4 life.

So, this entire thingy is me basically finding scraps and wanting to provr that charminghearts IS canon and WILL be established soon! (Im delulu)

[sleepymarimo]

𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐦𝐞 𝐮𝐩.

summary: after a job gone wrong, you have to call someone for help. you're pissed off at yourself for getting hurt. he's pissed off at himself for how much he actually cares. pairing: toji x fem!assassin!reader cw: blood, injuries, toji struggles w being soft an: another addition to my mini collection of stories w toji and an assassin buddy... the jjk brainrot is real wc: 2.2k +

a drop of rain brings you out of consciousness. one on the tip of your nose, then another of your temple. before you know it, the droplets of water are kissing you all over.

your eyelids peel open and it’s mostly dark, save for the fuzzy glow of a few neon signs right at the entrance of the alley.

a dull, throbbing pain pounds right behind your eyes. your bruised skin stings when you try to stand, muscles trembling from fatigue and from the chill in the air.

suddenly, you remember why you’re there in the first place.

in this line of work, it’s not uncommon for jobs to go wrong. but for you? now that happened every once in a blue moon.

your client had given you the wrong information, leaving you doomed from the start.

in all honesty, you were lucky enough to make it out of that den of hitmen and bounty hunters.

you were even luckier to have been able to stumble into an alley and collapse against the wall, hidden by dumpsters and shadows.

with shallow, slightly rasped breaths, you clench your jaw and attempt to push through the pain.

but fuck, you’re only human.

you won’t cry, you won’t. you’re a big girl, an assassin, and you need to push your pride down and get help.

trembling fingers struggle to pull out your phone and when they finally do, you hesitate to punch in the numbers you’ve come to remember all too well.

would he even pick up? even care? you can only imagine the ego boost he’d get from this.

meanwhile, toji watches a boat race on an old television with mild interest. this dingy bar he’d managed to find was open all damn night, so he decided to wait out the storm there.

no comfort like a shitty wooden stool and cheep booze.

deep green eyes spare a wink to some floozy sitting across the counter. option one was the bar, but it was good to have a quick fuck and cheap bed to fall back on.

the buzzing of his phone that he’s come to associate with jobs has his brows furrowing for a split second.

he recognizes the number. it’s his favorite occasional coworker and the only other assassin that’s tolerated him for more than one mission.

“‘ey, doll.” he grimaces as the boat he placed his bet on falls to last, scoffing before roughly adding in. “what’dya want, huh?”

your words get caught in your throat, weighed down by nothing but dignity, yet the rain and aching of your limbs force you to swallow it down.

“t-toji.” you don’t mean to let your voice crack, the sound almost pathetic. “i, uh, um…”

instinct snaps him into place, making him sit a little straighter. his expression isn’t serious per say, but it’s oddly blank.

it’s not exactly in his nature to entertain things of this sort, but he throws you a bone, because you’re you.

“what’s up, doll?” he presses, tone firm as he idly toyed with the rim of his glass. just because he didn’t get drunk didn’t mean that he couldn’t appreciate the burn of whiskey down his throat. “whatcha need?”

you can barely hear him over the sound of the beating rain. your teeth sink into the meat of your inner cheek.

“help, toji.” you exhale shakily, wincing when the action causes a sharp pain in your side. “i need your help.”

with a grunt, he’s quick to stand and knock back the rest of his whiskey. the thump of the barstool against the floor doesn’t deter him, nor does the angry yell from the bartender.

“yeah, i gotcha, sweetheart.” he hums into the phone, still not taking the matter seriously as he leisurely kicks his bike off its stand. “tell me where. and y’better have some cash handy, too.”

toji senses you when he’s about a block away, the rain doing little to nothing to put a damper on his base instincts.

he picks up on the sound of your shallow breaths, the metallic scent of your blood, and he unwillingly speeds up until he’s at the alley.

you’ve had time to cool down and put away any reservations that you might’ve had about keeping your pride intact.

once he steps foot into the alley, you can’t hold it in.

you’re cold and wet, beaten and bruised. everything hurts and fuck, you’re aware that you look beyond pitiful.

regardless, those familiar pine green eyes of his, perhaps for the first time, bring you nothing but comfort.

your mouth opens and closes, unable to get out the words you’d been rehearsing since ending the call.

instead you sniffle, the tears rolling down your cheeks and blending in with the drops of rain falling from the sky.

the sorcerer killer is taken aback, his swift mind working to make connections and understand what the hell was going on.

was this really you? the stubborn, smart and fiery assassin he’d been working with these past few months? the woman who’d killed countless targets with a cold detachment that made his core burn?

your lip trembles, the cry you let out snapping him out of his thoughts which he seemed oddly caught up in. “toji?”

brisk and urgent steps bring him to you, then he’s kneeling down to your level and scooping you into his arms.

“shit, sweetheart. what the fuck?” his black brows furrow, an unexpected swell of anger pulsing through his veins.

your arms, cold and wet and bruised, are quick to wrap around his neck. fuck your pride, you needed this.

“j-just get me home.” you snivel, gripping onto him like a lifeline. “it fucking hurts, toji.”

not needing to be told twice, he slaps a helmet onto your head and speeds off to your place.

the roads are empty, illuminated by the occasional streetlamp.

on the whole ride there, he’s just wondering whose teeth he had to kick in to fix this whole mess. a disaster is what this whole thing is, an utter shit show that has him so irrationally pissed off.

your apartment is familiar, a place he has stayed many times whether you liked it or not.

he sets you on the couch before storming to the bathroom and rummaging though your cabinets. bandages, gauze and painkillers- he messily gathers it all into his hands before practically throwing them on the ground in front of you.

toji can’t recall ever patching someone else up. he’s only ever worked on himself and even then, he didn’t care much for being gentle.

that could explain why his movements are so awkward and oddly uncoordinated.

“just fucking hold still, will you?” he grumbles, every wince and cry of yours only adding fuel to his fire.

“okay, okay.” you nod and sigh, not daring to give him any lip as he tries his genuine best to clean up some of the bigger wounds. “m’trying.”

a pile of bloodied bandages begin to form on the ground, the velvet liquid contrasting with the white cotton. the pain subsides as the medicine works it’s magic, turning into a tolerable ache.

it’s your shivering that catches his attention next, his boiling anger having been reduced to a neat simmer. he’s more composed, feigning indifference as he takes note of the chill on your skin and how your wet hair clings to you.

“always somethin’ with you.” he comments, rolling out his shoulder before taking purposeful steps to your room.

it’s a place he actually hasn’t been in all that often, but he doesn’t really think about that.

his large hands forcefully tug open drawers at random, not bothering to close them as he hunts for some dry clothes for you.

he does spare an extra glance or two at your panty drawer, but shrugs it off and returns to the living room. his free hand combs through strands of black hair, the action grounding him.

still sat on the couch, shoulders shaking from the cold, you look down at the bloodied bandages on the floor.

you’ve had time to collect yourself, too.

luckily, for both of you, you’re not crying anymore. however, your dulled, void eyes admittedly have him holding down another surge of anger that threatens to make him lose his cool.

in your head you reflect on what happened, thoughts spiraling to find a way to regain control of this whole thing.

you’re upset with yourself for not being thorough enough. you’re embarrassed that he had to see you so vulnerable, that you allowed him a glimpse into what lay behind the tough front you always put up.

it’s a cocktail of emotions he wants to stay far away from, so he dismisses it entirely.

he holds your clothes out to you, allowing his eyes to rake over your form as his signature smirk crawls onto his face. “y’want me to help ya outta your clothes, princess?”

your eyes narrow, huffing as you take the clothes from him in a bid to salvage some of your tainted pride. “i can do it.” you stubbornly murmur as warmth blooms in your cheeks.

there she is. he thinks, grin rivaling that of the cheshire cat while he begrudgingly turns around to give you some privacy. there’s my girl.

your soaked clothes hit the ground with a muted thud, the sound of the pattering rain echoing through the thin walls of your apartment.

the sigh of relief you let out is his cue to turn around. he’s pleased to find you dry and looking a lot more… like you.

you’re sat on the other, more dry end of the couch and he’s quick to follow your lead and plop down beside you.

the worn cushions dip beneath his weight and he settles in like he owns the place, throwing an arm on the backrest.

“really got ya this time, huh?” he muses aloud, unable to keep himself from prodding. “and here i thought you were untouchable.”

your arms cross, albeit a little slowly from the lingering pain. “not my fault. the wrong information was given t’me. i didn’t-” a frustrated sigh leaves you. “i didn’t do anything wrong.”

his small jabs do exactly what they were intended to. in his own way, he gets you to open up and spill the details of your assignment.

“oh yeah, ‘course you didn’t do anything wrong. don’t wanna tarnish your perfect rep, sweetheart.” he let’s his hand fall from the backrest and onto your shoulder, drawing you closer to his inviting warmth. “bet ya still did what ya needed to, even though you got all fucked up, right?”

you don’t pull away from his touch, instead finding yourself leaning into it. your eyes don’t quite meet his as you opt to rest your head on the bulk of his shoulder.

“yeah.” you mumble, satisfied with yourself in that regard. “got the intel i needed. didn’t kill all of ‘em, but i took out the only guy i had to, so...”

he hums, the sound rumbling in his chest. his hand starts to slide up and down your arm, mindful of the bruises littering your pretty skin.

toji knows better than to get involved, especially when there was nothing in it for him but the carnal pleasure of tearing into the throats of the lowlifes that made you bleed.

that doesn’t stop him, though. he’s a man who loves to indulge, to risk, to hunt.

“where at?” he asks with an innocent curiosity, speaking as if he were discussing something as mundane as the weather.

yet, you can just tell what he’s thinking.

you’re mildly surprised at how he seems to be vengeful on your behalf. you don’t presume it to be something as tender as protectiveness.

no way.

your cheek squishes against his clothed skin, trying to dismiss his question. “doesn’t matter, i got it done. s’long as i get paid-”

he draws you a bit closer, his free hand cupping your chin and firmly lifting your head so that you could meet his gaze.

the scar on his lip quirks upward, the coolness of his words strikingly different than the fire burning behind his green irises.

“sweetheart,” he starts, leaving no room for debate as he draws out his words. “where at?”

it’s like being back in that alley again, cold and scared and finding comfort only in his presence.

and fuck, though you wouldn’t admit it, a twisted sense of satisfaction unfurls in your chest at the prospect of him painting walls red for you.

when your mouth opens, it’s to tell him exactly where those bastards are.

he smirks and nods, giving your chin a smug squeeze before standing and stretching his arms. “wasn’t that easy, doll? don’t worry your pretty head about it.”

“yeah, yeah.” you sigh, crossing your arms as you watched him prepare to leave. it’s not like the two of you to butter each other up with sweet words, but you can’t deny that you’re grateful.

the door opens, the rain continuing to fall down from the clouds.

“toji,” you call, catching his attention before he could fully walk out. your tone is soft and genuine, yet another side of you being displayed to him. “thank you.”

he doesn’t do this shit, the whole squishy moments and heartfelt words. his actions alone, how he’s getting ready to stain his hands for you, are enough to let you know how much he cares.

brushing off any sort of sentiment which may have imbued itself into this moment, he shrugs and replies to you over his shoulder.

“gimme some of the cut from the job and we’ll call it even, sweetheart.”

[messedupfan]

Chapter 21

Summary: The morning after the school fundraiser, Wanda and Y/n share their fears and expectations. Rachel notices the change in her Baba's behavior. Jean has a heart breaking session with her wife.

A/n: Hellloooooo!! Y'all I watched Deadpool and Wolverine over the weekend and Y'ALL I LOVED EVERY SECOND. Mostly enjoyed dancing in the 4DX seats. But lived for every moment in the movie. My goodness. Idc to hear criticisms or negative comments about that movie. It's everything to me. I love love LOVE it. Anyway... enough of my rant. Hope y'all enjoy this chapter!

Masterlist | All Stories Taglist  | All Chapters

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sun glaring through the curtains disrupts your sleep. You turn away from facing the window and smash your face into someone’s back. You breathe deeply through your nose. Your lips lift almost instantly as you recognize Wanda's scent. You press your lips to her back as you continue to breathe her in. Wanda stretches as her internal clock starts to wake her up. 

You move up and lean against her headboard and smile down at her as she faces you. Her brown hair is a mess, her freckles are prominent. Her eyes are a deeper green, reflecting from the green top she chose for bed. 

“Hi,” you say when Wanda opens her eyes. 

“Hey you,” she replies through a yawn. Her eyes close as she does and she stretches again. “Give me a minute and I'll make us something to eat,” she says as she blinks her eyes slowly. 

“Don't worry about that right now,” you say in a raspy voice. You move her hair out of her face. “Just be here with me. Let's enjoy this moment together while we still can.” She closes her eyes as you rest your hand on her cheek. She leans into your touch. 

“Last night was,” Wanda smiles and bites her bottom lip as she replays the memory in her head. Second to the day her children were born, that has to be her favorite memory. 

You chuckle, “Yeah, it was.” You continue to gaze down at her. You want to kiss her and technically you can. But you're not sure if she wants that right now. “Do you still feel that way?” You ask softly, to confirm with her that things are moving in a direction that the both of you are comfortable with. 

Wanda opens her eyes as moves her hand out from under the covers to touch your arm. “Yeah, do you?” Her fingers dance along the length of your arm. 

“Of course I do, I’ve admitted it three times now,” you say with a humorous tone. 

Wanda remembers each time with a fond smile. The first time she threw herself at you when the two of you got drunk together and kissed. She didn't know that you had confessed your growing feelings towards her until you later apologized about it. The second time isn't the one you're thinking of. The second time wasn't the night that you showed up at her house. That was the third and most painful attempt for her. The second happened the night she had to pick you up from the bar. You kissed her and when she asked what you were doing you said that it was something that you should have done before. “Four times actually,” Wanda corrects you softly. 

“What?” You laugh, not sure if you heard her correctly. 

“Nevermind,” she says as she curls her body against yours. She closes her eyes as she inhales your scent again. It's one thing to have items that smell like you. It's so much better to have you right here. In her arms as a person instead of a fantasy. 

“I love you,” you say to see how she feels about hearing those words from you. She opens her eyes and there isn’t the fear that you’ve seen in them before. It’s a brightness to them. It’s a loving gaze you've witnessed her give her children. “That doesn't scare you?” You ask her to be certain. 

“No,” she smiles and moves her face forward, her lips connecting with yours. Neither of you mind the sour morning breath because you're just happy to be kissing each other. Her soft lips pressed against yours make you feel more alive than you ever had before. At this point, you're not sure if you existed before now. “You don't have to worry about me, Y/n. I'm in this. I want us to take it slow for us to prove to ourselves it's what's meant to be, before we get everyone involved. But I'm not afraid of my feelings for you. I'm not afraid of being loved by you.” 

You nod as you wrap your arms around her small frame and press her closer to your body. “So we're going to keep this under wraps for a bit?” You ask, clarifying what she means when she says that she wants to take things slow. 

“Just until we are certain what this is. I mean, we've talked a lot about what we want for our futures. But not really what kind of partner or what we really think of each other. I have an image of you in my mind as I'm sure you have one of me. I just want to give us time to… settle into the reality of each other.” Wanda explains and you agree. It's something that you weren't aware of with your past serious relationships. 

Sure, you knew Jean practically your entire life but you weren't paying attention to her as a real person until your marriage was falling apart. You had a fantasy of her in your mind that you built up when you were crushing on her. She fell short a lot and it wasn't her fault. She didn't know that you had built up years of expectations of her. 

With Daisy, she had expectations of you that you're still not sure if you met. She never said anything about it but you could tell that sometimes she wished you were the person she made up in her mind. In her defense, she probably expected you to be a lot more in love with her than you were and that is a fair expectation. 

With Wanda however, you aren't sure what kind of person you've made her up to be in your head. You know that you have some idea of what a life with her would look like. You kept comparing Daisy to her after all. And it's true, you could have made her out to be a perfect person for you in your mind. But she could just be a good friend for you. You almost laugh at the thought. There's no doubt in your mind that you're supposed to marry this girl one day. But she's right, you don't need to jump into anything. 

“Okay, yeah, I don't mind that. It'll be good to keep us to ourselves for a bit. Days like these where we can be with each other with no pressure to take leaps in our relationship before we're ready to,” you say as you rub her shoulder. “And the kids were so heart broken when we told them not to hope for this anymore.” 

Wanda looks down as she remembers that day. It broke her heart too. But it was an important day for her. Up until then, she thought she was done letting Vision win with the few moments that she stood up to him. Her therapist helped her realize, she was still letting him win every time she held herself back from happiness or from really moving forward. It wasn't that she wasn't ready to commit to a relationship because she didn't know who she was. It was because deep down, she was still Vision’s wife. Her therapist helped her learn how to free herself from that mental marriage. 

“Yeah, and I’m still working on myself. I feel like if we did end up breaking up the boys would blame me and I wouldn’t be able to tell them any different,” Wanda pouts as she thinks of her boys having proof that she is the problem because they love you so much as it is. 

“Wanda, I am far from perfect. I'm going to make many mistakes and so will you,” you say with a light tone because it's the truth and there's no reason to pretend like it's impossible to mess up. “The important thing is that when we do make mistakes, it's not something that drives us apart. We take that as a learning moment. I mean there are obvious things like no cheating. But if someone makes a pass at you or someone kisses you and you come to me about it, we can talk about that and figure out how to move past it. You know?”

Wanda nods as she listens to you, she hadn't considered that she didn't need to be perfect all of the time. She hadn’t considered that you weren’t a perfect person. Even though both of you have shown each other flaws in the year that you’ve gotten to know each other, there is still so much to learn. “I’m certain that I want to be with you and only you. Which is why I’m okay with going at your pace,” you stress that you’re not doing this to see if you want a future with her. You already know that. You’re willing to go slow because you don’t need to rush anything. 

At this statement, however, Wanda starts to laugh. “You do realize that this will be your third relationship in less than a year?” The thought makes you laugh as you realize that you have become a serial monogamous in terms of dating. 

“In my defense, I wasn’t certain about Daisy. And I was only dating Nebula to pass time. She knew it wasn’t serious and I never tried to make it anything more than what it was.” You defend your actions. 

Wanda laughs more as you defend yourself because she wasn’t being serious when making the observation. She is in no position to judge, she has slept with so many people this year that she lost count because she couldn’t believe how high the number had gotten. How she got through it with only one minor STI is beyond her. “It’s fine, you’re fine, it’s just funny to me,” she says through her laughs. 

You join her as she laughs because it's contagious. She is so bright and bubbly this morning and you feel very privileged to be present for it. Then your phone rings and as much as you want to ignore it, you have to make sure it’s not any kind of an emergency. You look at the screen and sigh when you see the picture of Jean and Rachel making silly faces. You put your finger to your lips and warn Wanda to be quiet as you answer the phone. She kisses your cheek and climbs out of her bed to run to the bathroom. 

“Hey, what’s up?” You answer the phone with a tightness and dread building in your chest. You don’t want to go home yet. You don’t want to leave this bubble. Not yet. You’ve barely gotten to enjoy it. 

“Hey, sorry,” Jean says in a whisper. “I forgot that I have couple’s counseling with Anna in an hour. I hate to ask because you’ve been so generous-” 

“Rachel is my daughter, you don’t have to feel guilty about asking me to come home for her,” you remind her. With the odd arrangement, Jean has been asking you to babysit Rachel. As a parent, that’s not babysitting. She claims that she had gotten so used to asking her wife to babysit Rachel and that little piece of information bugged you. Anna adopted Rachel, making her Anna’s daughter as well. You found it to be very disrespectful that she considers spending time with Rachel babysitting. “Just give me twenty minutes, I’ll be there soon.” 

“Okay, thank you,” Jean says, then she ends the call. 

You sigh as you rub your face. Wanda comes out of her bathroom wiping her face dry with a towel. She sits on the edge of the bed and rubs your back. You can smell the flowery perfume from the products she uses. When she asks you what’s wrong, you can smell the mint on her breath. You remove your hands from your face and flash her a small tired smile. 

“Nothing, I just,” you sigh and shake your head. “I hate going home now that Jean is staying with me.” 

“Woah, when did that happen?” Wanda asks as her hand stops on your shoulder and starts to gently massage you there. 

“A few weeks ago. She got into a big fight with Anna and stayed with me for a night which I was fine with one night. Now it’s gotten a little ridiculous but what am I going to do?” You shrug because you hate the situation that you’re caught in. You scoff bitterly as you think about how Anna wanted to separate their lives from yours but she forces situations like this to happen. “She had Rachel ask if she could stay instead of asking herself, which was just… I don’t know. I can't get into it with you right now.” You say as you pull away from her touch and stand from the bed. You stretch your sore muscles. The pull out mattress in the couch was horribly thin because it has to be and it’s taking a toll on your body. It was nice to have a break in Wanda’s comfortable and clearly expensive mattress. 

“Wait, hold on. I want to be there for you with this,” Wanda says as she tries to be a good partner. “Don’t shut me out.”

“I’m not shutting you out I’m,” you sigh as you make your way around the bed to the side of the room where her closet has your clothes from last night hanging. You almost trip on a dress and you realize how messy her room is. It makes you smile for a second when you realize that it was from the effort she was making in her appearance last night. You grab your shirt and start to button up. “The situation makes me upset. No, it’s infuriating actually. Anna is putting a lot of the blame on me when it’s a shitty situation because of – no, I won’t go there.” You start to pull on your pants and Wanda is standing at the entrance of the closet watching you. 

“I can’t be upset about it because I want to lead a good example for Rachel. Her mom needs some support. It shouldn’t be me, but she alienated everyone else in her life, so it is me,” you explain as you finish getting dressed. “Talking about it gets my blood boiling. So, I’m not shutting you out. I’m just trying to make it throw the day without blowing up at my ex-wife in front of our daughter.” 

Wanda nods, feeling slightly guilty for trying to get you to open up about something that she doesn’t know anything about. But she was only trying to do the right thing so she gives herself a break because she couldn’t have known and you were communicating that you can’t talk about it right now. She watches you move to sit on her bed and thinks about what she can do to help you shift your mood while you get your shoes on. When you stand up and dust yourself off she stands in front of you and wraps her arms loosely around your neck. 

“I love you,” she says and she feels the tension in your shoulders disappear. She leans up and kisses you on the lips. Your body melts against hers in the kiss as you feel safe and secure in her presence. You close your eyes and commit every detail of this moment to your memory so that you can get through the day. And tomorrow. And however many days you have to go without holding Wanda and kissing her. 

You rest your forehead against hers and sigh with content. “I want to stay here with you,” you admit with a pout. 

“I want you to stay,” she says as she lays the palm of her hand on your chest and takes a deep breath. “You have to go. I’ll see you soon, I’m sure. The boys will want to hang out with Rachel,” she says as she thinks of ways she can still see you while you’re going through this tough time with your ex. 

“And I have the orders to finish. One is due in two weeks and the other is due in four,” you remind her. 

“Oh, yeah, you do have to come back for that,” Wanda smiles up at you. “Is this your way of inviting me into the shed for some alone time with you?” She wiggles her eyebrows and it makes you laugh because you didn’t even consider that. 

“No, but hey, it definitely gives me an excuse to take you out on a real date on the weeks you don’t have the kids. That is, if I continue to have an unwanted roommate,” you brush the back of your fingers against her soft cheek. 

Wanda’s fingers play with your tie, her eyes have dropped to adjust the knot. “Is this your way of asking me out on a date?” 

You chuckle, “Of course not. I know better than to mention my ex-wife when asking you out on a date. I'm just saying that the option is there. But I have to get going.” Wanda agrees to let you go. You get one last kiss before you run off to your car. 

The entire drive home you have a wide grin. Wanda is happily spinning around her room like a love sick teenager. She stops when she realizes that one she's is too old for that only because she could throw up. And two, she needs to call Matt to make sure that he doesn't report anything to Agatha. Wanda bites her lip as she thinks about you and her sneaking around. As if you were in some torrid love affair. 

She spends her morning telling everyone that the plan didn't work and that she chickened out when she saw you with Nebula. Carol felt sorry for her and offered to hang out later that day. Agatha was irate; she thought the plan was perfect. She had put in so much time and effort. Wanda and Carol ended up comforting her with how upset she was. She even sent the pictures to the group chat that she received from the mom who was part of the organization of the event. Wanda panicked a little as she thought of the woman having access to photos that could potentially kill her story. But Agatha thankfully mentions that the photographer was an amateur that didn't have enough memory to take photos after a certain point in the night. The last picture that Agatha sends is of you smiling at Nebula. 

Wanda tries to disregard the twinge of jealousy that she feels when she sees you happy with the other woman. Then she remembers whose bed you woke up in this morning and she is filled with joy again. She agrees to a movie night with Carol but she regrets it the moment she realizes she can't pretend to be sad. She tries to look at old photos of her and Vision and nothing. He has no affect on her emotions anymore. Then she tries to look at the image of you and Nebula but she can't get sad again. 

Jean ignores you when you come home. You were a couple of minutes late because of a few traffic jams. She was clearly upset with you but you could care less. You are on cloud nine because you finally have the woman that you’ve been pining for. It had only been close to a year, but it felt like centuries. 

Once you’ve changed into a fresh set of clothes, you start to make breakfast. You have music blasting on the bluetooth speakers you hardly ever use. She comes in, receptive to your energy, singing along with you. Even when she takes control of the music you are still dancing around and singing. Full of energy. 

“Why are you so happy?” Rachel asks with a mouth full of pancakes and eggs. 

“I’m always happy!” You say as you pour syrup on your plate. 

“Not this happy!” She giggles and her laugh is infectious. 

“What? Come on, I’m happy like this,” you make a silly face. “And I’m happy like this,” you make another silly face which makes her laugh harder. “And I’m happy like this!” You take a banana wheel from your plate and dip a side of it in syrup then glue it to your nose and make another silly face.

“You’re right, eat your food and we’ll go to a movie or something. You deserve a happy day,” you say as you stab your food with your fork. 

“No, baba! That’s sticky and gross!” She says as she knocks the banana off of your face with her giggles.

“Can we wait for mom to come home?” She asks as she eats her food. Her voice is so innocent and sweet. You nod with a smile. 

“Sure, we can wait for mom. She might not want to go though. Will that be okay?” You ask as you watch your daughter. She has no idea what happened last night and you want to tell her every little detail. You refrain from it because when you do tell her about you and Wanda, you want to say that you're marrying her. You want to have proof that it's forever. Of course, you can't be certain that the marriage will last forever. But you want to believe that you can. 

“Yeah, I guess that will be okay too,” she frowns a bit as she continues to eat. Then she perks up. “Do you think we can invite Billy and Tommy and Ms. Wanda?” Her eyes are wide as she asks. The excitement evident in her face. 

“Sorry, sweetheart. The boys are with their dad until tomorrow,” you say apologetically. 

“Oh, that's right. I'm not supposed to be here until tomorrow too. Sorry,” she finishes the food on her plate then looks back up at you. “When can I go back to mommy's house?” 

You chew slowly as you consider an answer that will be helpful for your daughter. Another thing that you hate about this situation is the lack of communication between you and Jean. You have no idea how her marriage is going. You have no idea when she's going to be moving back home. You have no idea how long she's going to be gone for today. 

“I’ll tell you what,” you say as you finish up your plate. “I'll call Wanda and ask if she and the boys are available tomorrow or at least some time this week. How does that sound?”

Rachel perks up again, happy about the idea. But then her energy drops. “I still want to go back to mommy's house. I didn't get to pack any of my things.” 

“Honey, what would you need to pack? You have enough stuff here,” you take her hand in yours as you read her face. 

“Because mommy got to pack some of her things,” Rachel says. “I didn't get to do that. I miss my stuff. I miss my room. I miss the house. I miss Anna.” She starts to grow emotional and you are quick to pick her up out of her chair to hold her as she cries. You tell her that it's okay to miss things when she apologizes. That it’s okay to miss her other mom. 

When she stops crying, you tell her to go shower and get ready. You grab your phone and you send a text to Jean letting her know that she needs to arrange a day for Anna to hang out with her daughter since Rachel misses her. Then you walk to the balcony from your room and call Wanda. “Miss me already?” Wanda says as she answers the phone. Her voice has a smile to it that is infectious as you feel one tug at your lips. 

“Very much,” you sigh into the phone. “Rachel wants us all to hang out tomorrow, if that’s okay.” 

“I wish we could. My mom does this thing for the kids at the beginning of summer. Her and Pietro set up some tents in her backyard and she does a mini camp out. My grandpa used to do that for me and Pietro when we were kids. She always says that he did many things wrong, that was one tradition he did right. And she wants to pass it down,” she explains. 

Then you curse as you remember that you need to request time off for your camping tradition with Rachel. “I can’t believe I almost forgot this year. So much has been going on, she needs some normalcy,” you respond to Wanda’s concern. 

“I’m sure Pietro already has it on the schedule for you,” she assures you. “Anyway, I’m sure we can arrange for the kids to get together at some point this week. How is she doing?”

“She’s confused,” you sigh and shake your head. “It pisses me off that I can’t give her any answers. But I’ll save my frustrations for the shed.” Then you look up to the sky and smile. “Rachel noticed that I’m currently happier than I’ve ever been.” 

“Oh yeah? What were you doing? Skipping around the apartment singing love songs,” her tone is teasing and it makes you chuckle because that’s pretty much what you did. Without you confirming it, she knows that she was right. “See, you have to play it cool. If we're going to get any privacy at all. For instance, I have to pretend like you left with Nebula last night because Carol feels bad that my plan to win you over didn’t work. Something that would be happening had I been rejected.” 

“In my defense, according to you, I got some last night and I think I would be pretty happy about it,” you jokingly mention, making Wanda snort. 

“Okay weirdo, go tell your daughter that you got laid last night because that's better,” she retorts, making you laugh. 

“Alright, I get your point. I'll tone it down. But I can't promise the same for when we get some alone time together,” an electric current runs through your body at the simple thought of spending time alone with Wanda. You get filled with a fresh energy just thinking about her. 

“Good, I'd expect nothing less,” she giggles as she imagines you jumping up and down shouting that you are in love with her. She knows that it’s not something that you would ever do. But it’s cute to picture it in her mind. “I’ll let you go, I have to think of sad things to be thinking about to prepare for Carol tonight.” 

You chuckle at the idea that Wanda has to put up a facade that she is sad and rejected. You almost make a joke about giving her some pointers. But you refrain from it, unsure what her reaction would be. You don't want to make her feel guilty about focusing on herself. 

“Alright, good luck with that. I'll call you tomorrow? Or you'll call me when you can? I'll text you,” you don't know why you're rambling as nervously as you are. But it gets a giggle from Wanda. 

“I'll text you later,” Wanda says, then she ends the call and you try not to celebrate the fact that you have won her over. You have to play it cool. So you head back inside and wait for Rachel to finish getting ready. You scroll through the movies that are currently in the theaters and check on the ones she may or may not like to see what times and seats are available. Then you text Jean for an estimate of when she'll be returning and add that you're giving your daughter a fun day and that she wanted to spend it with her mom as well. 

Jean still isn't responding to any of your messages and you figure that she is still busy with her couples counseling session with Anna. You worry that you'll waste a day waiting for her to come home when Rachel wobbles out of the bathroom in her princess themed town with a crown hood to her bedroom.

You really want to give her a good day since she has been through a lot and still has a boot on her leg. 

An hour goes by with you and Rachel on the couch watching television before you finally get a message from Jean. She says that she needs a “pick-me-up” and would be happy to have a fun day. Then she responds to the message about Anna and says that after the session they had today, she isn't sure if that will be possible. Then she says she's on her way home.

You inform Rachel only that her mom is joining on the fun day and that she'll be home soon. She cheers and doesn't ask any questions other than what movie she should pick to see at the theater. You show her the options and she takes a long time. 

“Which one will be good for you and mommy?” She asks because in the past the two of you would argue forever about what to put on when it came to watching movies at home. You shake your head. 

“It's your day, munchkin. Don't worry about us. We'll be happy with whatever you want. Okay?” You tell her as you rub her back to ease her fears. She had grown to be such a people pleaser and it's not a terrible thing to be. But a lot of anxiety comes with that and you want her to be okay with being a little selfish sometimes. It's okay to ask for her to ask for what she wants from time to time. 

When Jean returns, her eyes are red and her cheeks are blotchy. She was lucky enough to come at a time when Rachel was in the bathroom. You help Jean get to your bedroom and ask her what’s going on. 

She starts to cry again as she sits on the edge of your bed. “Anna went on a date. She told me that she needed to be reminded of why she married me in the first place and that she needed to see if things would be easier with someone else.” You shake your head as you sit next to Jean and rub her back with soothing circles. As she starts to sob, you pull her towards you as you do your best to comfort her. Sure, she puts you through a lot but at the end of the day she is Rachel’s mother and she is your childhood friend. You can’t seem to let go of that. No matter how hard you try. 

“Did she say anything else?” You ask when she starts to settle down a bit. Jean nods against your chest. “What did she say?” You want to see what Anna said about the situation first before you say anything about it. Because right now, you want to have her kicked out of the house she is in because she doesn’t own it. 

“She said that she couldn’t see herself building a life with anyone but me. That nothing happened on the date. All she did was listen to the woman yap on and on and that made her realize she only wants to listen to me yap. Which kind of felt offensive but was also very sweet. Then she went on and on about how she loves me and how she would never betray my trust like that again,” she moves out of your arms to blow her nose in the tissues she pulls from the box on your nightstand. 

“How does that make you feel?” You ask as you watch her. 

“Cheated. Betrayed. Hurt,” she sniffles in between each word. You nod as you start to rub her back again. “It also makes me unbelievably angry at her. Because she is the reason we are going through any of this at all. It’s her fault that we’re separated. It’s her fault that my relationship with you is strained and my daughter is confused. I’m just… UGH!” She stands up as she starts to pace around the room. There’s not much you can do when she gets upset like this other than to just sit and listen. If you had said that there was nothing that could bring your mood down earlier, she just turned you into a liar. 

Jean’s rants are cut short when Rachel knocks on the door and asks if she can come in. She freezes and hides in the bathroom while you step out. You apologize to Rachel for worrying her and assure her that you and her mom were just talking. You sit her in front of the television to be distracted while you finish with Jean. Thankfully, when you close the door and Jean comes out, she has washed her face and looks a lot calmer. She pulls you into a tight hug. 

“Thank you for putting up with me,” she sighs with her eyes closed. “I’m going to shower and then I’ll be ready for the fun day with you and Rach. How are we doing with time?” 

You pull away and look at your watch, “We still have a couple of hours before the movie starts. We already bought the tickets. Rachel was certain that you were going to join us because she wants you to be happy today too. So, please, even if you can’t get happy… just fake it for her. She’s eleven, she doesn’t need to put up with your marital problems.” 

Jean nods and agrees to put on a brave face for Rachel. You leave her to get ready and grab something nicer for you to wear and get changed in the main restroom before joining Rachel on the couch. She snuggles up to your side and you smile as you realize that the age of her rejecting you is creeping closer and closer each year. You dread the day that finally happens but embrace this moment while you can still enjoy it. 

“That movie was so funny!” Rachel says as she replays her favorite moments in the movie as the three of you walk out together. She is jumping around and shows off the themed popcorn bucket, happy that she was able to get one. 

“You know you shouldn’t have gotten her that,” Jean quietly says. 

You shrug, “Today is her day to be happy and carefree and look at her,” you point out that she is having fun with her popcorn bucket. Jean laughs at her silly daughter. “Just let her be happy. You’re probably going to have to break some pretty tough news to her soon.” She nods as she lets out a deep sigh. She pushes away her feelings towards her current issues as Rachel runs up to her and asks her what's wrong. Jean looks to you because you’re better at coming up with something on the spot. “Mommy is jealous she couldn’t get one of those. But she is very happy for you!” You tap her nose. 

Rachel groans and rolls her eyes at the boop. “Baba, I’m eleven now. Don't boop me anymore. That’s for babies.” Your heart drops as you see this being the beginning of the end. 

“Oh, my apologies,” you say as you hold your hands up in surrender. 

“It’s okay, you forgot,” Rachel shrugs. “Can we get takeaway for dinner?” She asks as she fidgets with her bucket. “I want to go home and watch the other movies!” 

You frown as you scratch the back of your neck. “Are you sure you don’t want to eat somewhere nice? Or go to the park?” 

“Baba, it’s my day,” she reminds you and you chuckle as you agree. 

“You’re right,” you lift her on your back and hold your reaction when you adjust to holding her weight. It wasn’t because she was too heavy to carry, it was because you were anticipating a lighter weight. You hadn’t realized that she’s grown so much. “This is queen Rachel’s day. And she wants takeaway and the rest of the Despicable Minion movies!” She laughs when you combine the titles in the big old English accent you were attempting. 

“Onward!” She giggles as she uses her bucket to point to the parking lot. 

Jean laughs as she walks behind you. She hasn’t seen this side of either of you in some time. Anna is more focused on what’s better for Rachel’s emotional and physical development. Which wouldn’t be a bad thing if she was silly every now and then. Jean is starting to question if Rachel’s eating habit started because of the overly healthy food that Anna was enforcing around the house and it grew from there. Jean is starting to think that maybe Anna wasn’t as good for them as she previously thought. In the car, you and Rachel go back and forth as you try to beat each other to saying “I love you” first and it makes Jean nostalgic. She hadn’t realized how much she missed days like this. 

Wanda is pacing back and forth, anticipating Carol’s arrival. She isn’t certain it will just be Carol or if she’s planning on bringing Valkyrie with her. Will there be another group call with Agatha and Darcy? She doesn’t know what to expect for this night of comfort. She isn’t sure if she can pretend for more than one person tonight without imploding. 

She only has herself to blame for this predicament. It wasn’t supposed to go this way. She was supposed to be celebrating out loud about the results of last night. But then she felt herself begin to freeze. The pressure of telling everyone that she found someone that she is certain about, again. To then include everyone in every aspect because they all feel invested in the relationship. She didn’t want to make a fool of herself again. Not after the nightmare that Vision is. But she also doesn’t want the responsibility if things aren’t as good as she made them up to be in her mind. 

Wand closes her eyes and stands still in her living room. She counts to five as she takes slow breaths to center herself. She needs to stop spiraling. She needs to be present. Wanda knew that working herself up was going to benefit her performance tonight, but it was going to hurt her for weeks. She doesn’t want to shorten the honeymoon phase with you. She wants to bask in the glow of a brand new relationship a bit longer. 

The knock on her door has her racing to open it in order to get this night over with. Carol rushes past her while holding a plastic bin full of items that Carol has prepared for the night. Valkyrie walks in behind the blonde with a kind smile. She hugs Wanda as she apologizes for the plan failing. 

“Oh it wasn’t anyone’s fault,” Wanda waves it off as she steps out of the hug and shuts and locks the front door behind her. 

“I know, but it’s just… one of those things to say,” Valkyrie shrugs and Wanda nods. She couldn’t argue with that. 

“What’s all this?” Wanda asks as she peeks into Carol’s bin. She is confused by the contents. 

“We tried the natural way, now we’re going to try the witchy way!” Carol says happily. “I got all of this stuff together as per Agatha’s instructions.” She proudly admires the bin on the kitchen table with her hands on her hips. Wanda looks at Valkyrie who just rolls her eyes and mutters something about having tried all day to talk Carol out of it. 

“Agatha put you up to this?” Wanda asks as she rummages through the bin with a frown. Carol nods with a big grin. The brunette nods as she realizes that she is way out of her depth. She expected rom-coms or maybe horror movies. She expected comfort foods and wine. She expected a group phone call where everyone took turns telling sob stories about failed relationships or crushes that didn’t become anything more than that. She did not expect witchcraft as a solution to cheer her up. 

“We are doing spells to either make you fall in love with me or make your next date go terrible, I will keep you posted,” you try not to laugh too hard at the text you receive from Wanda. Included is a picture of Carol and Valkyrie on a video call with someone and a bunch of ingredients for something odd all over the table. You don’t respond as you put your phone back into your pocket. The three of you eat pizza together at the kitchen table with the movie marathon for Rachel playing on the television. She is hardly paying attention to the conversation as she has her eyes glued to the screen, no matter how much you try to bring her focus to the conversation. So you stop trying and Jean moves on from the childish subject. She is currently more curious about your relationship status than she is interested in talking about the camping trip you’re trying to plan with Rachel. 

“I wasn’t expecting you to not come home last night,” Jean says just above a whisper. You freeze and look over at Rachel to see if she was paying attention at all. She was on the edge of her seat watching the movie. 

“Honey, if you promise to be clean. You can eat your pizza on the couch,” you offer so that she doesn't fall over and hurt herself. She cheers as she adds a slice to her plate and grabs a handful of napkins to bring with her to the sofa. You focus on eating your food and ignore the comment that Jean made. But she doesn’t seem to take the hint. She assumes that you sent Rachel away for privacy. 

“Okay spill, what happened? I thought that you weren’t sure where you stood with Nebula?” Jean asks, careful to keep her volume low. 

You sigh through your nose and fight a smile as you think of the events of the previous night. You don’t want to tell her anything about anything. “Yeah, I just needed a night to myself in a real bed. I didn’t stay with anyone.” 

“Oh, I'm sorry. I hadn't realized that you were so uncomfortable,” Jean says as she places her hand on your forearm. You shrug with a small huff of a laugh.

“You never ask,” you remind her. 

Jean nods as she moves her hand back and forth on your arm. “Reading you was never really something I was ever good at. Was it?” 

You shake your head as you lean back in your seat and dust off your hands as you finish your pizza slice. “No, it never was. But that’s okay,” you give her a tight closed mouth smile then you push back on your seat and rise. You grab her plate and yours and take them to the garbage in the kitchen. You keep your back turned to her in the kitchen as you check your phone. Wanda has sent more pictures of the spell casting process. You can’t believe that her friends believe any of it is going to work. She confirms that they’re doing a spell to ruin your next date because the process was easier and you respond by reminding her that she will be your next date so whatever happens she only has herself to blame. 

You put your phone in your pocket and turn around to a surprise. Jean is standing in front of you. She is close and there is a familiar look in her eyes. You shake your head, even though you can’t read her mind, she is pretty predictable. You should’ve known that she would try something when she came back crying about Anna’s date. 

“Please,” she begs in a whisper as she puts her hand on your cheek to keep you in place. There are tears on the brim of her eyes as she gets closer. You put your hand on her wrist to remove her hand but she is quick to kiss you on the lips. You quickly shove her off of you. 

“Jean, I cannot believe you right now,” you say with a stern tone. You move out of the kitchen to keep yourself from exploding on her. She will not ruin your daughter’s day by starting an argument with you. This is a much smaller space than the house. It would be impossible for you and her to argue without Rachel hearing. You join Rachel on the sofa and keep your eyes on the animated movie on the screen. 

Jean doesn’t leave the kitchen for some time. She is having a hard time with her emotions. She hates feeling rejected and lately that’s all she is feeling. From you. From her wife. From everyone except Rachel. If anything, she can continue to be a good mother. She walks out of the kitchen only to bid you and Rachel a goodnight before heading to bed. She holds and cries herself to sleep as she thinks about her recent actions. She doesn’t feel in control. She misses the control. 

The next day, you go grocery shopping by yourself so that you can talk to Wanda about what happened with Jean. You don’t want to hide something like this from her. The first time you call her, you’re in the car. She doesn’t pick up and you decide to wait for her to call you back. You focus on getting to the store safely instead of calling her again. While you’re at the store, your focus is on grabbing the items from the list but you can’t help the anxious feeling of wanting to speak to Wanda. You take a moment to stop in the middle of an aisle to check your phone for any missed messages or calls. You don’t see any so you continue on with your shopping. 

As you’re loading the groceries into your car, that’s when your phone goes off. The moment that you have your hands full of bags of course is when your phone finally goes off. You quickly get the groceries into the trunk and then struggle to pull your phone out or your pocket. You are filled with joy when you see the picture of Wanda with Tommy and Billy and their fresh mullets to match yours at the time. 

“Hey, sorry I couldn’t pick up earlier. I was trying to get Carol and Val out of here. They’re gone now and I’m getting ready to pick up the boys from their dads house,” Wanda says as soon as you answer. You continue to load the rest of the bags as you listen to her ramblings. “Was there something you needed to talk about or were you just missing me?” You can hear the smile in her voice and it warms your heart. 

“If I say both, does that mean your witchcraft worked on me,” you joke as you close the opening of the boot of the vehicle. You walk the shopping cart over to the cart corral because you hate when people leave them in an empty parking spot. 

“That’s funny,” she says with a small reaction to your joke. “We didn’t do anything that would work and if we did, we didn’t do anything that would have you under my spell or whatever.” She corrects your wrong assumptions of the night and you laugh. You climb into your car and warn her that she is about to switch over to the vehicle's speaker system. She points out that she was just about to do the same. The both of you say hello until you can confirm that everything is working correctly. “Okay, so what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?”

“Jean kissed me,” you blurt out almost instantly. You freeze as you wait for her to respond before you even try to pull out of the parking spot. Then you relax a bit when you register Wanda’s laugh. “Did you hear me correctly? Do I need to repeat myself?”

“No, no, I heard you. I just, I’m sorry,” she starts to control her laughter. “I’ve been expecting this pretty much since you told me that she was staying with you and her marriage is falling apart. It’s, honestly, I’m surprised she has held out this long,” Wanda explains her reaction and you can’t disagree. This is very on par with Jean’s actions. You can’t help that you hope she changes but you can’t be disappointed when she shows you who she is. 

“Yeah, well, it happened and I wanted you to know. I know that you know it meant nothing to me but it still felt important to tell you,” you say as you pull out of the parking lot and merge into traffic. 

“Thank you,” Wanda says with relief in her tone. “That, it means a lot to me that you didn’t hide it. I’m glad you told me.” She knew she wouldn’t have to worry about trusting you. She also finds it kind of ironic that you used the example of someone else kissing her and on the same day, Jean kisses you. “And you’ll have to remember how cool I was about this in the future. Just saying,” she adds with a short giggle. 

You roll your eyes but chuckle, “Alright, I will store it in my memory.” You reply sarcastically. The two of you fall silent, each of you focusing on your separate drives. “So, when are we going on this disastrous first date?” You ask as you get close to your apartment building. 

“Hmm, how about next Sunday after I drop the boys off with their father? I know I don’t have them tonight but I don’t want us to have to cut the date short in case there is an emergency.” Wanda suggests. 

“Next Sunday it is,” you agree, you pull into the parking garage and drive up to your floor. “Are we still good to set up something for the kids this week?” 

“Um… yeah. I think we should be. I don’t think I have any projects that will take over my evenings this week. But boy, the lineup for this year is going to be insane. I don’t think I want to work for Tony ever again. He is such a drama queen about the sketches for the next Stark building.” You chuckle as she complains about her former brother-in-law’s behavior about the building she is supposed to design for him. “I have to let you go, I’m close to Vision’s house and I do not have it in me to hear him bitching today.” 

“No worries, love. I need to get the girls to help me with the groceries,” you say as you park and shut the engine of the car off. 

“You can’t give me a pet name right now!” Wanda shouts and you laugh at her reaction. Loving the effect a simple pet name can have on her. “Vision hates when I have joy in my life!” She continues to scold you. 

“Okay, okay,” you say through your laughter. “What can I call you to change your mood?” 

“Ugh, nothing at this point. I really have to get off the phone now,” She says as she slows her car. “Okay, love you, bye!” The car goes silent and you sigh, unable to say a proper goodbye for yourself. You allow the warmth of the way she says her goodbye so naturally settle in your chest. It’s as if that’s how the two of you have always ended a conversation. It fills you with so much joy that this is going to be your new normal. It fills you with excitement that one day you will be pulling into her driveway with a car full of groceries. Either with her or coming home to her. You can see it all now. You want to take the leap and make the fantasies a reality but you agreed to go at her pace. There is still a lot that neither of you don’t know about each other and even though you’re certain that you’ll love her no matter what, you don’t want to rush anything. You’ve seen what rushing a relationship looks like. You won’t make those mistakes yourself.

Chapter 22

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[kevgansey]

couldn't help but think constantly about season 2, like we are getting introduced to new characters (and new cast members 💓💓), but mostly because of annabeth. i've always seen som and botl as annabeth's books, they let you understand her personality, what she wants, what she is.

so there's some of the annabeth's moments that i really exacted/hope to see in the next season cause i know leah would EAT these parts yeah

“we could use your intelligence” “because you have none on your own!”

on princesse adromeda where luke is talking to both annabeth and percy, and he tries to convince annabeth to join him, pushing on something that he knows annabeth is extremely attached to, her intelligence. annabeth tries to stay strong, to don't freak out about how, her long time friend, her brother has turned out. even with this sense of sadness she is always the sassy little queen that we have been introduced in the first book !

CC.

i love the scene at circe's. and i can't wait and i do really HOPE to see the reyna/hilla cameo. i guess this scene is important because in some ways we see annabeth give up immortality for percy. and this is just the first time.

the whole backstrory with cyclops and it will be even better if we get some flashbacks

every single memory from her childhood is important to the construction of her character, there wouldn't be annabeth if there wasn't her memories. i guess this part of her story is important to let the reader (and in future the watcher) think about how much bad things annabeth went though since the age of seven. she has been fighting monsters since she was seven.

the sirens scene

okay, this is mostly percabeth BUT i just love how determined annabeth is in that scene, yeah i know that lot of people would consider her actions pretty stupid but be honest with yourself. first of all she was 13, she was a child, second thing, because of that we are getting introduced to her fatal flaw, pride. in that moment annabeth didn't know if she would had another chance to listen to the sirens so she took the opportunity that she had.

“ Three people sat on a picnic blanket in Central Park. A feast was spread out before them. I recognized Annabeth’s dad from photos she’d shown me-an athletic-looking, sandy-haired guy in his forties. He was holding hands with a beautiful woman who looked a lot like Annabeth. She was dressed casually-in blue jeans and a denim shirt and hiking boots-but something about the woman radiated power. I knew that I was looking at the goddess Athena. Next to them sat a young man … Luke.

The whole scene glowed in a warm, buttery light. The three of them were talking and laughing, and when they saw Annabeth, their faces lit up with delight. Annabeth’s mom and dad held out their arms invitingly. Luke grinned and gestured for Annabeth to sit next to him-as if he’d never betrayed her, as if he were still her friend.

Behind the trees of Central Park, a city skyline rose. I caught my breath, because it was Manhattan, but not Manhattan. It had been totally rebuilt from dazzling white marble, bigger and grander than ever-with golden windows and rooftop gardens. It was better than New York. Better than Mount Olympus. ”

this part is just so extremely dear to me. we see what annabeth really wanted. her dad, her mom, her brother and her biggest desire to create building because she wants to be remembered through them. the things that we don't see in this scene are percy and thalia. thalia, she is gone, annabeth would neved see her again so why even think about her as someone who would come back in her life, and percy. percy, that she already consideres as her percy. she knows that she already has him in her life. this scene is so sad and full of meaning we see the cruelest desire that annabeth has. she wants her family back. she wants to be someone one day. and she wants to feel proud of herself.

[felassan]

Hey so something caught my eye in the latest GI video interview, I was wondering if you'd seen anything more about: "each faction has a follower, as well as an ancillary character we’re calling 'agents', who exist as these, face of the faction." I couldn't find anything else about agents in the original article(s) but I was wondering if you'd seen anything? It sounds like they're different to the companions in our party?

hello! ◕‿◕ answer under a cut (contains spoilers from DA:TV GI cover story).

Mention in the GI video:

John Epler: “The message of The Veilguard is, you’re not saving the world on your own. You need your companions but you also need these factions, these other groups in the world. You help them, they help you. Now, something we wanted to avoid, because, you know, there’s always the trope of, 'oh yeah, I would help you save the world but I need you to go gather 200 wood’, it’s kind of a silly concept, so what we wanted to build is these factions that do want to help you but have realistic challenges, problems in front of them. So narratively, you help them with their problems, they will help you with yours when the time comes, but beyond that each faction has a follower, as well as an ancillary character we’re calling 'agents’, who exist as these, face of the faction. We’re not gonna get too deep into those right now, but we didn’t wanna just say, 'here’s the Wardens, go deal with the Wardens’, we wanted to have characters within that faction who are sympathetic, who you can see and who become the face of that faction, so even if there’s moments where the faction as a whole may be on the outs with you, these characters are still with you, they’ve still got your back. It’s a core with what we’ve done with the storytelling in this game. We wanted to make sure all the content you did felt relevant. Everything you do has a purpose and has a tie back into the critical path. Sometimes it’s more explicit than others, but there is always a sense that you are moving towards the goal of stopping the elven gods, stopping the end of the world, and it’s not just [like how some of the side content in DA:I was]. Helping these people, helping these groups, so that they can help you when the time comes.” [source] <- DA:TV spoiler warning for link

these "agent" characters were mentioned before in this article, where John Epler said:

"Gameplay-wise – each of our classes has a specialization, and each of them is tied to a faction," Epler continues. "But beyond that, each faction has a [companion] as well as [people we're calling agents, ancillarily] who exist as the faces of these factions. We didn't want to just say, 'Here's the Grey Wardens, go deal with them.' We wanted characters within that faction who are sympathetic, who you can see and become the face of the faction, so that even if there are moments where the faction as a whole may be on the outs with you, these characters are still with you; they've still got your back." [source]

but this looks like it's mostly the same quote as the first one (it sounds like the GI video interviews were turned into a lot of the GI text articles). I don't recall seeing anything more on them.

it does sound to me like they are different to the companions in our party though, as they're saying that each faction has a companion/follower + an agent[s?]. this is speculation only, but based on this excerpt from the GI cover story,

"A few moments later, we’re back in the Arlathan Forest, and just before a demon-infested suit of mechanized armor known as a Sentinel can attack, two new NPCs appear to save us: Strife and Irelin. Harding recognizes them, something Dragon Age comic readers might know about. They’re experts in ancient elven magic and part of the new Veil Jumpers faction. The ensuing cutscene, where we learn Strife and Irelin need help finding someone named Bellara Lutara, is long, with multiple dialogue options. That’s something I’m noticing with Veilguard, too - there’s a heavy emphasis on storytelling and dialogue, and it feels deep and meaty, like a good fantasy novel. BioWare doesn’t shy away from minutes-long cutscenes."

I wonder if e.g. Strife and Irelin could be the agent[s] for the Veil Jumper faction? also as an aside, I'd love to see Teia and Viago for the Crows!!

[GI video]

[ladysomething]

I unironically think Max and Charles may have conspired in some way too! It probably wasn't even that explicit, but it was mutually beneficial to both of them for Charles to win as many points as possible. Max didn't have the car to do it anymore himself, and Checo wasn't going to be any help. But Charles was consistently peeling points off Lando and McLaren while being further back in points than Lando thanks to that awful post-Monaco stretch, so he was basically exactly the teammate Max needed: not an immediate points threat for the season but very much an immediate driving threat in individual races to fight when Max couldn't. Then Charles wanted to win for himself and Ferrari, but specifically I would bet almost anything that as an ego thing he could live with Max getting his fourth WDC but over his dead body would Lando get one before he did.

Whether they explicitly discussed it idk, but I always felt like they both recognized they were effectively on the same team. They were going through it in that Zandvoort cool down room together. Max also said Monza was a low point for him, but it had to be a massive relief to see Charles win and realize someone could minimize the damage.

it's so hard to say whether it was something they actively talked about, or whether it was just something Charles took upon himself.

I could kind of believe that, particularly because it was mostly Charles that was the one doing it, right? But, then, Brazil ........... Max like pointing out Charles' mistakes .... like we all know they debriefed after that race. and, sure, they did still fight against each other, but imo it wasn't an agreement like "I will help you win at any cost", it was more of a ... "if it can't be me, I will NOT let it be Lando" kind of situation.

so, yeah, Charles wasn't not racing Max, he was just helping where he could. and Max was helping him where he could, in order to maximise Charles/ferrari points, and minimise lando/mclaren points.

but anyway, yeah, you're right for their reasoning. I think it absolutely worked in their favour to help each other, and I would bet any money that Charles thought of it in those terms. Max MAYBE thought of it in those terms. there is a possibility that they talked about it together, but I bet it was almost in a joking "ha ha, wouldn't it be so funny if .... ha ah jk ... unless 👀" kind of way.

long story short, I've thought it for pretty much the entire second half of the season, and it only became more obvious. people have actively been commenting on how they're acting like teammates.